Your Relational Needs
God designed every human with three great relational needs. You have emotional, intellectual, and spiritual relationship needs.
The Lord is to be the first one to meet these needs. Whatever burden you have on your heart, whatever dream, goal, desire you have, should be brought to the Lord first. I Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
But when God made Adam God said it wasn’t good for man to be alone. Please note God did not say it wasn’t good for a man to be unmarried, God said it wasn’t good for man to be alone. God intentionally designed the perfect man with a need to have relationships with people beside God.
For married people these needs can largely be met by their spouse. For children their parents are to meet these needs. But as children become adults they grow out of their parents ability to meet these needs. Every adult single must learn how the people that make up their church is to meet these three great needs in their life. And because every church is made up of different groups of people the application is going to be somewhat different for every church. But it is the singles responsibility to step up and seek these three type of relationships.
Emotional.
The first need you have is the emotional need. This is where something happened and you feel mad, sad, happy, hate, love, ashamed over the issue and you need to let someone know about what happened and how you feel about it.
The Bible tells us in Galatians 6:2 “Bear ye one anothers burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
The other people in the church are directly commanded to bear your burdens, but they cannot if you do not share them.
If you have been struggling with something for 5 or 10 years you have a need to share your burden. If something bad happened a long time ago or this week and you are still dealing with it you have a need to share your burden. If someone did you wrong and you are holding a grudge you have a need to share your burden. God designed you with the need to pour your heart out to someone. And as a single the someone you should pour your heart out to is a part of the church.
Intellectual.
As a person you are going to have things that are important to you. It may be school, work, or a hobby. You should be able to share the things you are intellectually interested in with the people in your church. The people in your church should be able to broaden your horizon on what you are doing.
Pro 27:17 Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.
If music is important to you then share your interest at church and see how far you can take your intellectual need in your church. It could go farther than you imagine.
If computers are your thing take your intellectual need to your church, and see how far you can take it.
If building stuff is your thing then take this intellectual part of your life to church and share it with people.
Whatever your intellectual pursuit is you have an intellectual need to share it with someone. And as you share that pursuit with others they will sharpen you.
Sometimes we feel that our intellectual pursuits are stupid, or silly, or that other people just wont get them, but that’s too bad. Because God set up the local church in part to give you a doorway into using your intellectual persuit for him. It very may well be an intellectual pursuit that you think you could never share in church becomes your favorite reason for going to church.
Spiritual
You have an innate need as a Christian to talk to other Christians about what God is doing in your life. Whether you are talking about what you read in the Bible, what you are praying about, or something you heard in a sermon, you need to be talking about spiritual things with others in the church.
Php 1:27 Only let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ:
There is a lot said about how husbands and wives should have devotions together. How parents should lead their children in devotions. But as singles you still have the same need for devotions, but the way to meet that need is through a member of the local church.
Conclusion
As a single are all of your relational needs being met? If not, which need is not being met? Are you willing to step up, step out and get your need met? It is your responsibility to get your need met. Meet the responsibility.
The Lord is to be the first one to meet these needs. Whatever burden you have on your heart, whatever dream, goal, desire you have, should be brought to the Lord first. I Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
But when God made Adam God said it wasn’t good for man to be alone. Please note God did not say it wasn’t good for a man to be unmarried, God said it wasn’t good for man to be alone. God intentionally designed the perfect man with a need to have relationships with people beside God.
For married people these needs can largely be met by their spouse. For children their parents are to meet these needs. But as children become adults they grow out of their parents ability to meet these needs. Every adult single must learn how the people that make up their church is to meet these three great needs in their life. And because every church is made up of different groups of people the application is going to be somewhat different for every church. But it is the singles responsibility to step up and seek these three type of relationships.
Emotional.
The first need you have is the emotional need. This is where something happened and you feel mad, sad, happy, hate, love, ashamed over the issue and you need to let someone know about what happened and how you feel about it.
The Bible tells us in Galatians 6:2 “Bear ye one anothers burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
The other people in the church are directly commanded to bear your burdens, but they cannot if you do not share them.
If you have been struggling with something for 5 or 10 years you have a need to share your burden. If something bad happened a long time ago or this week and you are still dealing with it you have a need to share your burden. If someone did you wrong and you are holding a grudge you have a need to share your burden. God designed you with the need to pour your heart out to someone. And as a single the someone you should pour your heart out to is a part of the church.
Intellectual.
As a person you are going to have things that are important to you. It may be school, work, or a hobby. You should be able to share the things you are intellectually interested in with the people in your church. The people in your church should be able to broaden your horizon on what you are doing.
Pro 27:17 Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.
If music is important to you then share your interest at church and see how far you can take your intellectual need in your church. It could go farther than you imagine.
If computers are your thing take your intellectual need to your church, and see how far you can take it.
If building stuff is your thing then take this intellectual part of your life to church and share it with people.
Whatever your intellectual pursuit is you have an intellectual need to share it with someone. And as you share that pursuit with others they will sharpen you.
Sometimes we feel that our intellectual pursuits are stupid, or silly, or that other people just wont get them, but that’s too bad. Because God set up the local church in part to give you a doorway into using your intellectual persuit for him. It very may well be an intellectual pursuit that you think you could never share in church becomes your favorite reason for going to church.
Spiritual
You have an innate need as a Christian to talk to other Christians about what God is doing in your life. Whether you are talking about what you read in the Bible, what you are praying about, or something you heard in a sermon, you need to be talking about spiritual things with others in the church.
Php 1:27 Only let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ:
There is a lot said about how husbands and wives should have devotions together. How parents should lead their children in devotions. But as singles you still have the same need for devotions, but the way to meet that need is through a member of the local church.
Conclusion
As a single are all of your relational needs being met? If not, which need is not being met? Are you willing to step up, step out and get your need met? It is your responsibility to get your need met. Meet the responsibility.