Becoming A Mentor
I believe every adult Christian needs some kind of mentor. But I also believe that every adult Christian needs to be a mentor.
There are two sea’s in Israel. The sea of Galilee and the dead sea. The sea of Galilee is full of life, and it has an outlet called the river Jorden. The river Jorden takes the life giving waters of the sea of Galilee to the dead sea. The dead sea has no outlet. because it has no way to pour its water into something else it is lifeless. You need to pour your life into someone else’s to flourish like the sea of Galilee. You need to be a mentor or you will stagnate.
Perhaps you are reading this and thinking “how can I be a mentor I am a single?” Paul was a single man and he mentored at least 3 people mentioned in the Bible. He mentored Timothy, Titus, and Ossesimous. If Paul as a single man can mentor and disciple others any single who is mature in the faith can disciple others. I would also argue that singles have a bigger personal need to disciple others because your married brothers and sisters in Christ can often get their need to pour their life into someone else met through their children. As a single you must get this need met through someone in the local church.
I would encourage you that the next time you go into your local church to look around and see how you view the people. Who do you see as a father/mother figure? Who do you see as a brother or sister in Christ? Who do you see as someone who looks up to you and you can take under your wing?
I will also say this, if the person you can take under your wing is not an adult you should clear anything you do with their parents. If you wish to mentor them or guide them in any way it needs to go through their parents because their parents are 100% responsible for anything their child does. And anything you do needs to be excessively in the open.
Question. Is there an area in the local church where you serve the Lord well enough that you can show another Christian how to do what you do? If not, then you should make it a goal in your life to learn to do something well enough in the church to teach others how to do a good job at whatever you do.
Question. How close are you willing to get to someone? You goal should be to be intellectual, emotionally, and spiritually intimate with the people around you. Even more so for someone God allows you to take under your wing.
Question. How much are you willing to let discipleship cost you? If you mentor someone and get close to them like you should it will cost you something. For Jesus, Judas betrayed Him. For Paul he was willing to pay Ossisimous’s debt. Are you willing to get close enough to someone to let it cost you something?
Question. Are you willing to get close enough to someone to where they will let you correct faults in their life. Your goal as a mentor is never to tell someone where they are wrong, but how to do something right. But what kind of relationship do you have to have with people where your approval and correction is more important to them than their pride?
Question. Are you willing to build a relationship to the point where if they have an addiction you are a safe person to share that with?
Ultimately I believe that every Christian singles relationship goal with the local church should be to become a mentor to a younger Christian. It is fine if it takes you a couple of years to get here. But being a mentor should be your goal.
According to III John 1:4 the greatest joy a christian can have in life is watching someone they mentored do right.
So your goal should ultimately be to pour your life into someone and the only thing you get in return is watching them do right. And yet God said that will be the greatest joy of your life. Are you ready to have a right relationship with the local church? How long do you think it will take you to become a mentor like Paul?
I guess I can conclude this series with this thought, as a Christian single your ultimate goal should not be to get your needs met, but to get your needs met for the purpose of meeting someone else’s needs. Maybe this goal will take a couple of years to reach, or more. But you have to admit it’s a worthwhile goal to help out people who are in need like you.
There are two sea’s in Israel. The sea of Galilee and the dead sea. The sea of Galilee is full of life, and it has an outlet called the river Jorden. The river Jorden takes the life giving waters of the sea of Galilee to the dead sea. The dead sea has no outlet. because it has no way to pour its water into something else it is lifeless. You need to pour your life into someone else’s to flourish like the sea of Galilee. You need to be a mentor or you will stagnate.
Perhaps you are reading this and thinking “how can I be a mentor I am a single?” Paul was a single man and he mentored at least 3 people mentioned in the Bible. He mentored Timothy, Titus, and Ossesimous. If Paul as a single man can mentor and disciple others any single who is mature in the faith can disciple others. I would also argue that singles have a bigger personal need to disciple others because your married brothers and sisters in Christ can often get their need to pour their life into someone else met through their children. As a single you must get this need met through someone in the local church.
I would encourage you that the next time you go into your local church to look around and see how you view the people. Who do you see as a father/mother figure? Who do you see as a brother or sister in Christ? Who do you see as someone who looks up to you and you can take under your wing?
I will also say this, if the person you can take under your wing is not an adult you should clear anything you do with their parents. If you wish to mentor them or guide them in any way it needs to go through their parents because their parents are 100% responsible for anything their child does. And anything you do needs to be excessively in the open.
Question. Is there an area in the local church where you serve the Lord well enough that you can show another Christian how to do what you do? If not, then you should make it a goal in your life to learn to do something well enough in the church to teach others how to do a good job at whatever you do.
Question. How close are you willing to get to someone? You goal should be to be intellectual, emotionally, and spiritually intimate with the people around you. Even more so for someone God allows you to take under your wing.
Question. How much are you willing to let discipleship cost you? If you mentor someone and get close to them like you should it will cost you something. For Jesus, Judas betrayed Him. For Paul he was willing to pay Ossisimous’s debt. Are you willing to get close enough to someone to let it cost you something?
Question. Are you willing to get close enough to someone to where they will let you correct faults in their life. Your goal as a mentor is never to tell someone where they are wrong, but how to do something right. But what kind of relationship do you have to have with people where your approval and correction is more important to them than their pride?
Question. Are you willing to build a relationship to the point where if they have an addiction you are a safe person to share that with?
Ultimately I believe that every Christian singles relationship goal with the local church should be to become a mentor to a younger Christian. It is fine if it takes you a couple of years to get here. But being a mentor should be your goal.
According to III John 1:4 the greatest joy a christian can have in life is watching someone they mentored do right.
So your goal should ultimately be to pour your life into someone and the only thing you get in return is watching them do right. And yet God said that will be the greatest joy of your life. Are you ready to have a right relationship with the local church? How long do you think it will take you to become a mentor like Paul?
I guess I can conclude this series with this thought, as a Christian single your ultimate goal should not be to get your needs met, but to get your needs met for the purpose of meeting someone else’s needs. Maybe this goal will take a couple of years to reach, or more. But you have to admit it’s a worthwhile goal to help out people who are in need like you.